A big part of achieving success is learning to manage your own emotions. We all have “hot buttons” which can lead us to feel anxiety, anger or even burn-out. Learning to be sensitive to our own feelings, to problem solve in order to analyze the surrounding situation and develop alternative responses, will allow us to redirect our emotions in a positive, constructive way which fosters success.
All of us face those moments when we experience anxiety on the job. Probably Oprah Winfrey and Bill Gates have those moments, too. You may have heard your company lost the account you were working on, or that someone, possibly your supervisor, has questioned your performance. You feel a moment of uneasiness. The important thing is to zero in on precisely what it is that’s making you uncomfortable and turn it into an opportunity to learn and do better. If you lost an account, find out why. Maybe it was a reason entirely outside your control, like the company was washed away in a flood and doesn’t exist anymore, or the president’s wife wanted to take over the account herself. If your supervisor questions your performance, try to turn him into a mentor who will personally help you do better, in a systematic program of coaching and feedback.
When something does not go as you expected, and you begin to feel anxious, it helps to understand, that is part of the package. The most seasoned professional in the world still feels anxious, at times, just like the most seasoned opera singer or matinee idol still feels stage fright; the trick is to keep it under control. You have to decide to take each day as it comes, do your planning, tend to your own job, be obsessive about details, produce the best quality product or service you can, and success will come.
One of the techniques which may help keep you on an even keel in your work is to develop a systems approach to your job. Set priorities and do first things first. Use check lists. Try to put more structure in your job so you’re not constantly drained by making hundreds of small decisions. Save yourself for the big moment, the huge contracts, the momentous decisions. This will allow you to devote more time and reflection to the most pivotal items, and be sure to get adequate feedback from your clients and your supervisor so you will be very clear on precisely the type and quantity of work which is expected of you.
If you start to feel anger at work, remember it is a natural manifestation of the “fight or flight” instinct, part of your survival reflex built into your DNA. Don’t get caught up in it, however. Instead, redirect your energies into problem solving. Try to understand what event or remark created this response in you, then address that in a constructive way. Learn to communicate more effectively and use self disclosure to encourage others to communicate with you. The better you understand your colleagues and their goals, the clearer your mission is, the more items which are expressed,”put on the table”, made explicit instead of implicit where they can be misunderstood or misconstrued, made manifest instead of part of a hidden agenda, the more positive and productive your workplace will be.
If you start to feel any of the symptoms of burn-out…. excessive tiredness, distraction, lack of interest, a vague sense of futility…. take immediate corrective action. It’s not uncommon for dedicated professionals to approach the precipice of burn-out. Many professionals are passionate about their mission and put in long, hard hours to accomplish it. Generally, accomplishment brings praise and rewards. Add a touch of ambition to that and you get a professional who pushes on to longer and harder hours, assuming that will bring more accomplishment, praise and reward. Often that is not the case, however. It is easy to cross an invisible line where achievement, riches and glory are on one side, declining health, frustration and defeat on the other. The fact is, after a certain point, one loses perspective and mental sharpness. Tasks take longer when you’re over-tired. You lose objectivity. Eventually, the judo principal is reversed, and leverage starts to move against you. The harder you work, the less you accomplish.
Burn-out is a definite workplace nose dive, so learn to recognize the symptoms and take the necessary preventative actions:
First, cut back on your actual hours, but increase the intensity of your focus, so those hours will be more productive.
Take a vacation, even if it’s only a long week-end or, in a crunch situation, an afternoon off. If you have trouble doing this, better start mastering the art of delegation and/ or the “work smart as well as work hard” method.
One of the best stress relievers is exercise. Schedule a walk or work-out at least once a day, even if it’s during lunch.
Plan an activity which is the opposite of your work. Go to a concert. Take your child, a neice or nephew to the zoo or to a children’s museum. Volunteer for a cause you believe in; even if you volunteer the same type of work you usually do, it will be in a different setting and will give you a fresh perspective and perhaps make you more appreciative of your own job. Try a new hobby like sailing, mountain climbing or even gourmet cooking; a challenging and consuming hobby will take your mind off your work, refresh your spirit, and call on fresh reserves of energy and drive.
Get out and meet new people, learn new things. You can do this in a professional setting by taking time from your work horse schedule to get a fresh view of what you’re doing, learn new skills and techniques and recharge your batteries. This not only alleviates boredom, it can reinvigorate you about your work, reminding you of the good you do and what your organization accomplishes.
In the end, it is you who are in charge of your emotions. And, although you can not control each and every event in your workplace, you can control your reactions and emotions and make them positive, constructive ones. This will put you in charge of your own space at work, which is about as much as anyone can ask and as much as anyone needs to succeed. �
