Ask for the Order: The Secret to Women's Success in Leadership

Do you know what it takes to advance in a leadership role? It may be a matter of learning to "ask for the order" (AFTO). AFTO is a sales term that closes the transaction by asking the customer to buy the demonstrated product or service. Consider that the progression you want in a leadership role is about convincing the hiring entity (the buyer) to want what you have to offer. This is not a practice only acceptable for men in leadership.

Women hold roughly one half the management and professional jobs in the United States, yet less than a dozen Fortune 500 companies are run by women. In order to be taken seriously, women leave corporate and strike out on their own to lead their own businesses, a shortcut to asking for the order perhaps. Women who stay often become isolated because there are fewer women at the top.

At the heart of the matter may be the inability for women to sell themselves, to practice AFTO. Even salespeople fail to directly "ask for the order" that they have worked hard to acquire. Women can suffer the same affliction. Women often wait to be invited to participate, whereas men, in general, seem to have a level of confidence in believing that others want to hear what they have to say.

A workshop at a New Jersey campus offers seven tips for women leaders that can be categorized as wellbeing, networking, asking, negotiating, focusing, fitting, and announcing. These seven outliers define how asking for the order can help women become more outspoken about what they want. Examining these seven tips for women leaders from the perspective of having an "ask for the order" mentality can equal success in any leadership role. Looking closely at the tenets of these seven behaviors can help us to determine how we may justify and accomplish asking for the order.

Wellbeing

Put your own wellbeing first. If you burn out, everyone loses. Especially, businesses lose when employees suffer from poor wellbeing. Consider too that selling you is about attitude. And attitude can suffer if you are not at your best. Asking for the order is very unlikely when you are unable to muster the necessary attitude.

Networking

Build a network of mentors and allies who will challenge and support you. Networking is the avenue to gaining knowledge and introductions, and it's the time to make the best of what you've got. Because application of performance improvement is a very good way to demonstrate its benefits, strive to showcase what you have done to apply your knowledge. Apply a networking approach that includes attention, attitude, and attendance to help you realize your networking goals.

• Maintain attention; stay alert to opportunities
• Maintain attitude; stay motivated
• Maintain attendance stay in the forefront

Asking

Know what you want and ask for it, whether it is a promotion or a new assignment. This is the key component in asking for the order. This mere act of doing in conjunction with the other tips for women leaders can bring about amazing results.

Negotiating

Rather than permit a NO to stop you, negotiate to an even better YES, but only when the time is right. We need to weigh the situation and determine if it is better to seek to change the condition, do nothing, or run away from the situation. There are times appropriate to each of these choices. Sometimes it is best to work through the issue. Other times you must run for your life. And other times it is best to do nothing when in doubt. So there is more than fight or flight in decision making, there is the option to freeze. Ask for the order when the time is right.

• Fight means to battle or negotiate to solve the situation.
• Freeze means to do nothing and tolerate the situation.
• Flee means to run away or leave the situation.

Focusing

Define your unique leadership values that will contribute to the success of the organization or community. We are all unique and special, but we need to identify how that bears upon the leadership role we seek. Asking for the order in this area means to be able to identify what you bring to the role. It might help you to identify your strengths, opportunities, and restrictions, permitting you to focus upon those areas in which you excel, where you can find support, and where you have weaknesses or threats standing in your way. This can be a kind of self-evaluation process to determine readiness for the targeted endeavor.

• Evaluate your strengths (Internal Environmental Factors)

Strengths are those internal assets you posses that will aid you in your ability to accomplish your objectives. Strengths are among your internal environmental factors.

• Explore your opportunities (External Environmental Factors)

Opportunities are those external aids that can assist you in managing the problem at a particular time and enhance your ability to accomplish your objectives. Opportunities are among your external environmental factors.

• Estimate your restrictions (Internal and External Environmental Factors)

Restrictions are those internal and external conditions such as weaknesses or threats that can impede your progress or your ability to accomplish your objectives. Weaknesses are those restrictions among your internal environmental factors and threats are those restrictions among your external environmental factors.

Fitting

Seek a match between you and the task or job. Do what you like. Chances are the job is one that best fits your personality and skills. In order to know this you might use some of the personality type indicators that can help you to assess where you might best fit into a leadership role. Once you are sure about your match for the job, you will have greater confidence in asking for the order.

Announcing

Performance is essential to business, so share your accomplishments. One means to announcing your accomplishments is to exploit your opportunities. Consider the situation, action, and resolution involved in an improvement effort that you have been involved in.

• What situation did you face?
• What action did you take?
• What resolution did you reach?

Develop a statement from your answers. Strive not to elaborate in this approach. However, be specific, brief, and use measurements to quantify your answers. Then announce your ability to perform the job or task you seek. Go ahead . . . ask for the order.

Sharon L. Bender, Ph.D. is an educator and author. She is also the inventor of a plethora of problem solving models. To contact Sharon, please visit sharonbender.com.

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